Meeting the Bar – Trimeric Poetic Form

Today at d’Verse Poetics, Mary is our pubkeeper. She has introduced us to the Trimeric Poetic form – a lovely and adaptable form. Come visit us to find out more about this form and read the poems submitted. I hope you will be inspired to try your own and link it up!  http://dversepoets.com/2015/10/08/meeting-the-bar-trimeric-form/

The Full Moon is the Watchdog
The full moon is the watchdog
Guarding the shadows of night –
muted leaves whisper
Secrets to the listening wind.

Guarding the shadows of night
The moon gazes as the cold wind
ripples fallen leaves on the empty road.

Muted leaves whisper
And are echoed by drowsy crickets
and a family of sleepy owls.

Secrets to the listening breeze
Are murmured by the pewter creek
Sleep walking through silver reeds.

 Andō Hiroshige 1797 – 1858 Full Moon and Reeds

Andō Hiroshige 1797 – 1858 Full Moon and Reeds

49 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Bryan Ens
    Oct 08, 2015 @ 23:59:34

    Love the muted leaves being echoed by the crickets. Lovely (as usual) 🙂

    Reply

  2. Björn Rudberg (brudberg)
    Oct 09, 2015 @ 00:58:31

    Oh I so love the moonscape yo describe, so serene that whisper and gentle sounds of crickets an owls.

    Reply

  3. kalyrical
    Oct 09, 2015 @ 01:15:27

    This IS a lovely form! And you’ve written a lovely poem 🙂

    Reply

    • kanzensakura
      Oct 09, 2015 @ 01:17:42

      Thank you! I was watching Heroes Reborn and thought of you when Katana Girl,Miko, came on the scene. How fun would she be to cosplay?

      Reply

      • kalyrical
        Oct 09, 2015 @ 01:21:27

        OMIGOSH!!! She is so cool. And bonus points to me not having to wear a wig because I’m terrible at wigs. !!!! Thank you!!!

        Reply

        • kanzensakura
          Oct 09, 2015 @ 18:13:46

          Yes she is. and such a tiny thing. I wish she would ditch Ren. So far, he is such a doink. When I do my daily sword forms, I’ve taken to wearing my hair a la Miko..grin. My husband laughs at it. If you go to the d’verse page and looking d’Team, you’ll find a backwards pic of me with my grey hair in much prominence with my sterling sakura hairstick in my hair. I guess it is silly for an oldster like me wearing my hair a la Miko but I can’t resist.

          Reply

  4. andysmerdon
    Oct 09, 2015 @ 03:04:18

    I like this form! I like this poem too 🙂 Thanks for sharing – I’m off to try it out 🙂

    Reply

  5. Sumana Roy
    Oct 09, 2015 @ 03:35:49

    love the scenic beauty and the whispers of the leaves….a beautiful trimeric….

    Reply

  6. http://vivinfrance.wordpress.com
    Oct 09, 2015 @ 05:22:38

    You make a lovely picture with your words.

    Reply

  7. Suzanne
    Oct 09, 2015 @ 06:26:42

    This is a lovely way to use the trimeric form. The piece of art you have used to illustrate your poem is beautiful.

    Reply

    • kanzensakura
      Oct 09, 2015 @ 18:07:11

      Thank you on both counts. I know it is hard to believe but I have a fondness for Japanese prints/woodblocks. 🙂

      Reply

      • Suzanne
        Oct 09, 2015 @ 22:27:11

        I do too and I love ink brush painting – both Japanese and Chinese.

        Reply

        • kanzensakura
          Oct 10, 2015 @ 16:05:20

          I bought brushes, ink sticks, and paper last year and have been learning. I’m not good with that sort of thing but it is fun to try. The ink sticks I bought are incredibly, scented with sandalwood. I love to make ink from them because of that. Wonderful quality that for the price amazed me.

          Reply

  8. Grace
    Oct 09, 2015 @ 07:47:10

    I love those whispering of secrets by breeze, creek and reeds under the watchful eyes of the moon ~ A lovely trimeric Toni ~

    Reply

  9. Mary
    Oct 09, 2015 @ 07:55:17

    A peaceful and restful scene written very well in Trimeric form! Love ‘sleep walking through silver reeds.’ I think your talents with language transfer well from your love of haiku form into the trimeric! Smiles.

    Reply

  10. Gabriella
    Oct 09, 2015 @ 08:09:47

    You really painted a scene for us to enjoy, kanzensakura. I think the last stanza is my favorite.

    Reply

  11. Sanaa Rizvi
    Oct 09, 2015 @ 08:41:31

    Such a magical trimeric Toni 🙂 you really aced this form!
    Beautifully penned.

    Lots of love,
    Sanaa

    Reply

  12. Let's CUT the Crap!
    Oct 09, 2015 @ 09:50:39

    Love all the small details. I somehow feel a hush as the moon observes earth with droopy eyes. The crickets are drowsy in their sawing and hardly make a sound. 🙂 ❤ ❤ A magnificent picture again.

    Reply

  13. georgeplace2013
    Oct 09, 2015 @ 10:19:57

    by the pewter creek
    through silver reeds….. so lovely, the mood of the whole thing is soothing.

    Reply

  14. Grace Black
    Oct 09, 2015 @ 12:25:46

    Beautiful imagery! The last stanza is stunning.

    Reply

  15. Victoria C. Slotto
    Oct 09, 2015 @ 17:57:16

    Just beautiful, Toni–a trimeric with the feel of Japan, of course! I’m smiling because mine has pewter in it, too.

    Reply

    • kanzensakura
      Oct 09, 2015 @ 18:00:51

      Great minds! The three lined stanzas put me very much in mind of Japanese poetry. I often write about night because I am an insomniac and sit outside or walk about in every kind of weather.

      Reply

  16. Snakypoet (Rosemary Nissen-Wade)
    Oct 09, 2015 @ 21:34:57

    Very beautiful.

    Reply

  17. Candy
    Oct 09, 2015 @ 23:48:51

    oh yes! this is dreamy.

    Reply

  18. Glenn Buttkus
    Oct 10, 2015 @ 18:44:01

    Lots of responses; nice to see. You give us the gift of an Asian perspective in ways that are so subtle & beautiful, it makes my stuff, as the Viscount of Verbosity, seem
    obese & clunky; I agree with Mary, the last stanza is killer.

    Reply

    • kanzensakura
      Oct 10, 2015 @ 21:23:05

      We all have our styles and voice. You gave voice to deep and true feelings with sincerity. I often wish to have more words. But Japanese spareness and wabi sabi are my style and voice. I write the way I use my sword and looked at the trimeric as cascading haiku. I love that last verse as well. I may trim it to be haiku or expand to be tanka. I was told in a comment last year my poetry was insipid and had no meaning. It hurt but I accept that I am not a poetic Samurai. That’s your task Glenn. Fight on.

      Reply

  19. macjam47
    Oct 13, 2015 @ 09:56:31

    Absolutely lovely trimeric poem.

    Reply

You've heard my voice, please let me hear yours. Let the conversation begin!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: