dVerse Poets Quadrille Monday

I am sort of back from my hiatus but not fully. I couldn’t resist this prompt word though from De for dVerse’s Monday Quadrille prompt – storm. A quadrille is a poem of exactly 44 words, not including the title, in which you must use the prompted word.

Painted in Tones of Argent
My backyard sleeps under
the full moon like a drowned Atlantis.
I sit on my back steps inhaling
the scents of honeysuckle and
a whiff of pot from my neighbors next door.
A faint scent of petrichor:
the storm breaks.
My mother is dying.

37 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Victoria C. Slotto
    Jun 04, 2017 @ 20:09:31

    Heartbreaking. poignant. So much solace in the beauty and calm of nature, Toni. I’ve been MIA, thus out of touch with what has been going on with you. Please know that you and your sweet mother are in my thoughts and prayers.

    Reply

    • kanzensakura
      Jun 05, 2017 @ 10:39:14

      I’m still MIA myself but slowly getting back into the routine. My mother is slowly starving to death – I can’t get her to eat. Right now her body is cannibalizing her body fat. I go to day to pre-arrange her cremation. So sad. So very sad. I think of you and others who have gone through this lonely time.

      Reply

  2. Shawna
    Jun 05, 2017 @ 00:45:27

    I love the next door/petrichor rhyme.

    Fantastic ending! Excellent poem. (And I’m sorry about your mother; going through the same myself.)

    Reply

  3. erbiage
    Jun 05, 2017 @ 02:15:21

    Beauty and sadness…

    Reply

  4. Sarah
    Jun 05, 2017 @ 10:52:58

    So sorry to hear what you and your mother are going through. ❤ God bless you both. And thanks for the new word – petrichor – beautiful. 🙂

    Reply

  5. MarinaSofia
    Jun 05, 2017 @ 16:37:00

    It’s a heartbreaking one, all right. I love that word (and smell) petrichor.

    Reply

    • kanzensakura
      Jun 05, 2017 @ 16:39:12

      I actually wrote this a couple of weeks ago and when I saw the prompt word, I posted it. I “enjoyed” your last posting. Talk about heartbreaking and soul shattering. You are a brave lady.

      Sent from Mail for Windows 10

      Reply

  6. whimsygizmo
    Jun 05, 2017 @ 16:49:01

    Oh, Toni. This is so heart wrenchingly perfect. I have no words. You are loved and lifted up.

    Reply

  7. frankhubeny
    Jun 05, 2017 @ 17:13:28

    Best wishes. You arranged the poem well with a description of a breaking storm and then the last line about your mother.

    Reply

  8. Björn Rudberg (brudberg)
    Jun 05, 2017 @ 17:32:58

    The backdrop of that fantastic evening to that end…
    never did the garden seem
    more alive
    than when I waited
    for its dying.

    Reply

  9. Ω
    Jun 05, 2017 @ 18:08:30

    What an incredible title … and poem. Excellent piece.

    Reply

  10. Beverly Crawford
    Jun 05, 2017 @ 18:21:53

    A tidy read , a smile at the neighbor’s pot, a search for the meaning of petriichor ….. and then the last line, a punch in the gut. May strength be yours.

    Reply

  11. Grace
    Jun 05, 2017 @ 19:01:36

    A faint scent of petrichor: I love this line

    This is a heartbreaking share Toni ~ Hugs and prayers for your mom~

    Reply

  12. sanaarizvi
    Jun 05, 2017 @ 19:15:10

    This is so heart wrenching 😦 sending love and prayers!

    Reply

  13. Waltermarks
    Jun 05, 2017 @ 20:38:31

    Ah, the last line is heartbreaking. I’m terribly sorry to hear about your mother. Bless You!

    Reply

  14. nosaintaugustine
    Jun 05, 2017 @ 21:14:19

    “Like a drowned Atlantis” was very cool. I was moved by the snapshot of everyday life juxtaposed against the momentous.

    Reply

  15. lillian
    Jun 05, 2017 @ 21:16:22

    Such everyday occurrences continue in the midst of a leaving – sitting on the back steps, and the storm breaking around you with the coming of your mother’s death. Dear Toni—it is so very hard to watch the woman who brought us into this world, slowly taking her leave from it. The mind can make that decision but sometimes the body grasps to stay here, even when breath is ragged. Know there are many affirming your journey, Toni. Wish I could be there to squeeze your hand, if but for a moment.

    Reply

  16. Sumana Roy
    Jun 05, 2017 @ 23:43:17

    ‘drowned Atlantis’ anticipates devastation to be found surfacing in the final line…may you have strength to bear the storm…every line and image touches so deeply….

    Reply

  17. sarahrussellpoetry
    Jun 06, 2017 @ 00:32:03

    Grabbed me right from the start, and didn’t disappoint. Good work.

    Reply

  18. kim881
    Jun 06, 2017 @ 02:36:17

    Oh Toni, I know and understand what you’re going through. I wish I could write something to comfort you but it is so painful and you have put it into words so beautifully, especially the title and:.
    ‘A faint scent of petrichor:
    the storm breaks’.

    Reply

  19. Laura Bloomsbury
    Jun 06, 2017 @ 02:58:10

    So much punch to the last line after we drifted along to a summer evening in those lovely lines- the impact of impending loss – so sorry to hear. There is weight to waiting through such times

    Reply

  20. Charley
    Jun 06, 2017 @ 10:02:33

    That last line is a hammer, ending the music. Powerful.

    Reply

  21. Misky
    Jun 06, 2017 @ 10:21:05

    The ending was unexpected, but then ones ending is always unexpected, isn’t it.

    Reply

  22. Colin Lee
    Jun 06, 2017 @ 10:23:45

    My thoughts and prayers with you and your mother, Toni sensei.

    Reply

  23. sreeja Harikrishnan
    Jun 06, 2017 @ 12:10:10

    With you in thoughts and prayers. ..you have wonderfully conveyed the feelings…!

    Reply

  24. lynn__
    Jun 06, 2017 @ 18:22:07

    The petrichor is the scent of hope of new life after death…God be with you.

    Reply

  25. Sabio Lantz
    Jun 07, 2017 @ 08:19:57

    Wow, that was perfectly packed. I love poems I can actually understand and feel. Poems where the author actually takes me on a trip.
    Your mother’s fading, the pot, the rich air and the contrasting image of sleeping but drowned, like a doomed city, yet under the wonderful(?) moon. All complex, yet all fitting nicely. Thanx

    Reply

  26. merrildsmith
    Jun 07, 2017 @ 15:25:53

    So much in these few words–poignant, heartbreaking, and yet there is the sense of life (and nature) going on.
    I’m so sorry about your mother.

    Reply

  27. ladynyo
    Jun 08, 2017 @ 06:32:18

    Oh, Toni. This is heartbreaking and breathtaking. That last line shifted the moon and sun for me. Blessings on your head and your mother’s too.

    Reply

  28. kaykuala (@hankkaykuala)
    Jun 09, 2017 @ 05:53:50

    My backyard sleeps under
    the full moon like a drowned Atlantis.

    It is as much as what a backyard is subjected to. It is dormant and undisturbed!

    Hank

    Reply

  29. el34ax7
    Jun 12, 2017 @ 08:54:38

    If I could sit with you and talk of nothings and everythings I would. You’re in my heart and thoughts. Thank you for sharing.

    Reply

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