This is posted for Poets United Midweek Motif – Meteor showers. It is also posted at dVerse Poets Pub Open Link Night. This happened years ago. It is an extended haibun.
Silent Road
Delta Aquarids –
escape from city lights – the
veiled stars will unveil
Hot night in July –needing to be out of the city, rolling down a smooth country two lane blacktop, soft roar of the tires – tack…..tack…..tack…..Rock in the tire tread – front passenger, I think. Black countryside, no lights showing in the few houses. Folks have to get up early go to work in town, go to work in surrounding tobacco fields. Rolling past rows of tobacco and corn row after row after row, broken only by the dark houses. The blooms on the green plants show up white in the headlights.
Past another small house, dark. Ahead off to the right a dirt road. I pull off and go down it slowly. Dust invisible but I can smell it, thick whiffs of sharp iron and sweeter lime. In the headlights ahead. Washboard shadows in the hard dirt where constant tires have cleared away the gravel. In the headlight the road is pale pink but in the daylight, it will be red as blood. To the left, a small drive leading to an empty space by the tobacco field. I pull in and park, cut the engine – the cooling motor goes ting ting ting…
insect sounds rise in
the darkness – chackachacka
hypnotic hum..
Except for the insects, dead silence. A dog barks some distance away then another closer by answers. In front of me as my eyes adjust I see several empty tobacco slides waiting for morning. Time of year to prime the thick leaves, snap by hand the thick stalks, heavy leaves of the plants, to be loaded in layers in the slides, then hitched to the back of a tractor to be taken to be to ancient tobacco barns and tied by hand to tobacco sticks, loaded by hand into the barn to dry for sale in the fall. I can tell by the snapped stalks on the plants, this is the third priming.
fireflies flicker – an
insect meteor shower
among the dark plants
One comes in my car window and settles on the steering wheel, White dark white dark – flashing its signals to an alien being who doesn’t understand the language. Smells of dust, acrid tang of tobacco sap, smell of cows from a field close by. Tipping the seat back I lean my head against the headrest And look at the stars through my windshield. The firefly continues its signals. Suddenly, several quick bursts in the dark sky and the stars begin to fall – trails of white falling towards the horizon, silent as dust. Some shimmer, some burst, they all burn in the summer night, streak after streak, fast, slow, dark and again they explode and fall. In the cool grey dawn, the stars have gone to sleep. The firefly has flown away. I drive slowly down the dirt road back to the two lane black top back to the city. Tack…..tack…..tack…..
July stars burst streak –
trails of fire in the black night
fade and disappear
Susan Chast
Nov 15, 2017 @ 15:42:07
Amazing scene, with sounds and sights and parallels! Whatever it was scientifically, there is also soul deep awe.
Frank J. Tassone
Nov 15, 2017 @ 15:44:39
This is a wonderful Haibun, Toni. The prose offers such evocative imagery. And the haiku accent the experience so well!
Frank J. Tassone
Nov 15, 2017 @ 15:46:15
Reblogged this on Frank J. Tassone and commented:
#Haiku Happenings #6: Toni Kanzen’s latest #haibun for Poets United and dVerse!
hypercryptical
Nov 15, 2017 @ 16:05:25
What a wonderful pace to your words Toni – sitting on the edge of my seat at the end of reading.
Love it!
Anna :o]
kanzensakura
Nov 15, 2017 @ 16:35:29
Thank you Anna. It was fun to write this.
thotpurge
Nov 15, 2017 @ 20:21:44
Lovely .. the scene and the narrative! I like the interlude with the fireflies before the larger cosmic experience!
Sherry Marr
Nov 15, 2017 @ 20:22:04
You took me right into the scene. I love the small insect meteor shower…..a wonderfully descriptive poem.
John Buchanan
Nov 16, 2017 @ 00:40:17
This drew me in, as if I were sitting beside you, wonderful images. Thanks.
Sumana Roy
Nov 16, 2017 @ 02:32:21
Love the description, so otherworldly. A human soul against such vastness simply gives me goosebumps. “an /insect meteor shower” is a sight to see specially for the city dwellers.
kanzensakura
Nov 16, 2017 @ 15:14:18
Thank you Sumana. Here in the burbs (years after this experience) fireflies are really plentiful during the summer. It is great fun to sit and watch them.
sanaarizvi
Nov 16, 2017 @ 15:08:09
My goodness this is absolutely breathtaking Toni!❤️ Love; “July stars burst streak –
trails of fire in the black night fade and disappear.”❤️
kanzensakura
Nov 16, 2017 @ 15:08:48
Thank you Sanaa!
Grace
Nov 16, 2017 @ 15:10:30
Such a dramatic experience to see all of that Toni ~ Love the sounds, falling stars and those fireflies flickering ~
kanzensakura
Nov 16, 2017 @ 15:13:14
Thank you. Nights in the country definitely ain’t dull!
poetrydiary
Nov 16, 2017 @ 15:14:36
I especially liked the fireflies against the dark plants.
kanzensakura
Nov 16, 2017 @ 15:15:16
🙂
Bryan Ens
Nov 16, 2017 @ 15:29:33
love the use of sounds in this. The sound of the rock in the tire, and the sound of the engine cooling take me right there.
kanzensakura
Nov 16, 2017 @ 15:32:07
Thank you Bryan!
kim881
Nov 16, 2017 @ 15:38:35
I enjoy extended haibun, especially those ones about your eventful life, Toni.I like the way the prose in this one is structured and the feeling of movement. That sound ‘tack…’ is so clearly a flat! I also love scenery that is unfamiliar:.’Washboard shadows in the hard dirt where constant tires have cleared away the gravel. In the headlight the road is pale pink but in the daylight, it will be red as blood. To the left, a small drive leading to an empty space by the tobacco field’.
So many unfamiliar sounds that seem familiar in this one – very cinematic.
kanzensakura
Nov 16, 2017 @ 15:41:00
Thank you Kim. I have been working on this one for about 5 years. It is finally getting close to my vision for it.
whippetwisdom
Nov 16, 2017 @ 15:38:40
What a magical experience Toni and I love all the sounds from your car and nature as you travel away from any light pollution to see this amazing night sky. I especially love ‘insect meteor shower
among the dark plants’ xxx
Björn Rudberg (brudberg)
Nov 16, 2017 @ 15:42:13
Really love all the senses. Smell sounds and sights. Nature and machine in combination- this must have been a wonderful experience
kanzensakura
Nov 16, 2017 @ 15:43:05
It was. Almost dead silence in the country and the dark….
Jane Dougherty
Nov 16, 2017 @ 15:52:53
Fireflies, wish we had those.
kanzensakura
Nov 16, 2017 @ 16:00:27
They really are magical.
Jane Dougherty
Nov 16, 2017 @ 16:05:07
Mini shooting stars.
kanzensakura
Nov 16, 2017 @ 16:06:10
It is great when you have a whole lot of them, winking on and off….
Jane Dougherty
Nov 16, 2017 @ 16:07:42
I imagine they make a sort of transition between the great expanse of darkness above and the noises of the night creatures below.
kanzensakura
Nov 16, 2017 @ 16:08:31
They do. Silent they are but so musical, nonetheless
Jane Dougherty
Nov 16, 2017 @ 16:19:44
🙂
Angela
Nov 16, 2017 @ 16:40:54
This was lovely! What gripping imagery that drew me in and kept me to th end.
kanzensakura
Nov 16, 2017 @ 16:56:55
Thank you!
Angela
Nov 16, 2017 @ 17:17:22
My pleasure.
Victoria C. Slotto
Nov 16, 2017 @ 18:49:52
Wonderful descriptions.
Colin Lee
Nov 16, 2017 @ 19:40:36
What a pleasurable read of your encounter with the insect meteor shower — slowing us down with a lowered headrest and a turned-off engine in a still untainted pocket of nature. Lovely.
kanzensakura
Nov 16, 2017 @ 20:10:32
Thank you Colin!
Alwi Shatry
Nov 16, 2017 @ 21:16:29
Perfect imagery and sounds for a mini cosmic display.
memadtwo
Nov 16, 2017 @ 22:41:16
I like the comparison of fireflies to meteor showers. (K)
Mary
Nov 17, 2017 @ 08:02:30
You have captured so much of the beauty of nature in this poem!
kanzensakura
Nov 18, 2017 @ 12:37:17
Thank you Mary!
MNL
Nov 18, 2017 @ 00:01:10
love how the firefly seems to be the first star/light before you start viewing the others through the windshield. Almost like at the airport where the person flags the planes to come down, the firefly signals the stars to start falling. Cool.
kanzensakura
Nov 18, 2017 @ 12:36:39
I am so glad you caught that. That is how it seemed to me at the time….