A Year

A quadrille for Kim’s prompt using the word cycle.  What is a quadrille?  It is a poem of exactly 44 words using the prompted word.  The title is not included in the word count. Exacty a year ago today, my mother died.

A Year
The year cycles through its paces
Summer, fall, winter, spring.
A full year has passed since you died.
Today dawns as it did last year –
warm and sunny,
deceptive in its kindness.
I sit on the back porch
listening to birds singing your name.

mama as a baby

40 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Gospel Isosceles
    Jun 18, 2018 @ 15:46:27

    “deceptive in its kindness” hits hard. It doesn’t seem anything could hurt when the sun’s shining, but…
    My heart is with you.

    Reply

  2. Björn Rudberg (brudberg)
    Jun 18, 2018 @ 15:55:10

    Somehow the summer and warmth seems so contradictory to your sorrow… may it still sooth your pains.

    Reply

  3. kim881
    Jun 18, 2018 @ 16:10:31

    Sorrow knows no season, Toni. A year slips by and the next one surprises us when we lose someone we love. These lines ring true for me too:
    ‘Today dawns as it did last year –
    warm and sunny,
    deceptive in its kindness’.

    Reply

  4. Frank Hubeny
    Jun 18, 2018 @ 17:01:04

    Nice phrase “deceptive in its kindness” and nice remembrance of your mother.

    Reply

  5. sanaarizvi
    Jun 18, 2018 @ 17:51:43

    I am so sorry for your loss, Toni. This is a beautiful poem.

    Reply

  6. Jo
    Jun 18, 2018 @ 18:14:26

    This is poignantly beautiful.

    Reply

  7. Strawberry Abbey
    Jun 18, 2018 @ 18:23:39

    A year. Wow. I am so sorry. I hope there is some solace in knowing she’s not suffering.

    Reply

    • kanzensakura
      Jun 18, 2018 @ 18:47:09

      Thanks. Some but not much. She suffered terribly in the months before she dieD but still….

      Reply

      • Strawberry Abbey
        Jun 18, 2018 @ 22:23:40

        I’m terrified of what’s to come with my mother. I think things are about to get worse for her. She seems really worn out, but women in my family live a long time, no matter how badly they ail.

        Reply

        • kanzensakura
          Jun 18, 2018 @ 22:50:41

          Women in my family are long lived except for my grandmother who died of an ugly and rare blood cancer at 85. My mother died at 87 from complications due to Alzheimer’s. An excruciating death. When my mother began exhibiting signs of dementia and hallucinations from Parkinson’s, I was terrified. But I knew I had to take care of her, regardless. In the end I had to place her in a skilled nursing faci!ity, private and they took good care of her. I visited her every day until the last month when I had to accept she was dying and place her into hospice care. But I feel no guilt, only a deep sadness.

          Reply

  8. coalblack
    Jun 18, 2018 @ 19:16:18

    This is beautiful, Toni.

    Reply

  9. Kathy Reed
    Jun 18, 2018 @ 19:35:15

    Really lovely Quadrille.😊

    Reply

  10. Waltermarks
    Jun 18, 2018 @ 19:59:10

    So many familiar things remind you of your mom’s passing. I’ll bet the birds are singing to her still

    Reply

  11. Grace
    Jun 18, 2018 @ 20:04:14

    Has it been a year ~ It seems like yesterday’s sad news ~ A lovely remembrance of your mom Toni ~ Hope you are well ~

    Reply

  12. V.J. Knutson
    Jun 18, 2018 @ 20:24:26

    Heart wrenching. Life fails to pay notice. Sorry for your loss.

    Reply

  13. rothpoetry
    Jun 18, 2018 @ 23:12:10

    You said it very well, the cycling of the years doesn’t take away the loss.
    dwight

    Reply

  14. sarahsouthwest
    Jun 19, 2018 @ 01:54:03

    Ah, these anniversaries. Sadness is almost worse when the sun is shining. Thinking of you.

    Reply

  15. annell4
    Jun 19, 2018 @ 08:17:03

    I love the pictures of your Mother and your poem.

    Reply

  16. Sherry Marr
    Jun 19, 2018 @ 12:58:18

    So beautiful and poignant. Your mother was so adorable as a baby. Thinking of you, Toni.

    Reply

  17. whippetwisdom
    Jun 19, 2018 @ 15:46:08

    A beautiful poem Toni, especially hearing the birds sing your mother’s name. Big hugs from all of us here xxx

    Reply

  18. purplepeninportland
    Jun 19, 2018 @ 16:38:13

    That first year is so difficult. You wonder how life manages to go on. Written beautifully, Toni.

    Reply

  19. merrildsmith
    Jun 19, 2018 @ 18:16:15

    Beautiful and bittersweet. Sorrow and love know no seasons and life goes on–we can appreciate beauty while still feeling grief. I’m sorry this must have been a difficult day for you.

    Reply

  20. Frank J. Tassone
    Jun 19, 2018 @ 20:46:20

    I remember the anniversaries of my parents’ deaths. My heart breaks for you. You epitomize the moment so well in this memorial!

    Reply

  21. Anonymous
    Jun 19, 2018 @ 22:13:56

    Kanzensakura, thank you for your blog post.Really thank you! Awesome.http://essaywritekd.com/

    Reply

  22. Jim
    Jun 19, 2018 @ 23:15:30

    This a nice tribute to your mom. Most of us can’t find a wee one picture of our Mothers, I’m glad that you have one. I don’t keep track of my parent’s deaths, Mrs. Jim does for her dad, it was very traumatic for her as a seven year old. Mom died in 1999, Dad and Mrs. Jim’s mom died in 2007. But we remember everyone’s birthdays.
    It is good to sit in a pretty place and reminisce.
    ..

    Reply

  23. vandana
    Jun 20, 2018 @ 03:22:56

    The beautiful heart warming memories…………….

    Reply

  24. Kerry
    Jun 20, 2018 @ 12:40:06

    The last two lines provide the key to the whole!

    Reply

  25. Vivian Zems
    Jun 20, 2018 @ 13:06:31

    The world always seems to mock our grief by cycling on, regardless. A poignant write.

    Reply

  26. Carrie Van Horn
    Jun 20, 2018 @ 19:54:33

    Sigh….that last line just grabbed my heart. This is a beautiful poem true to how the heart does hold on.

    Reply

  27. Arcadia Maria
    Jun 20, 2018 @ 20:04:39

    Beautifully written. Tugging at my heartstrings.

    Reply

  28. lynn__
    Jun 21, 2018 @ 22:45:31

    A poem full of memories and grief…i pray you may find comfort, Toni.

    Reply

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