August Moon

For Suman’s midweek challenge at Poets United. We are to write a poem about poeming. Also posting on dVerse’s OLN.

August Moon
Under the full August moon
I listen to the cicadas singing.
Their rasping and sawing pulls apart
the silence like an old woman
pulling apart the curtains of her bedroom window.
I sit on the back steps listening
to their music.
*Amanogawa flows by silently.
In my head
the poem begins to form.

*Amanogawa – Japanese for River of Heaven or, the Milky Way

copyright kanzensakura

 

32 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Susan
    Aug 08, 2018 @ 17:41:07

    The combination of elements here is seductive. I love that you use an old woman–like me–and think of Blake cleaning the lenses of perception so we can see the infinite.

    Reply

  2. Sherry Marr
    Aug 08, 2018 @ 18:28:19

    Love the image of the old woman opening the curtains. And especially love the idea of the River of Heaven.

    Reply

  3. vintage jellies
    Aug 08, 2018 @ 18:37:09

    Your line breaks are phenomenal, drawing out so many layers and images.

    I’ll comment more completely when I come back. But I want you to know, now, that this has touched me deeply.

    Reply

  4. Pat: willow88switches
    Aug 08, 2018 @ 19:39:45

    lovely imagery …. slightly soft and gentle, and yet sawing and probing … I love the contrasts … and how “music to inspire” for some, isn’t so for others, yet how a poem grows under the stars as they wend their way along … there is just something so “moonlit gorgeous” and sublime about this poem 🙂

    I really like it.

    Reply

  5. Sumana Roy
    Aug 09, 2018 @ 00:39:34

    Love the most beautiful imagery of how silence is being pulled apart. So vivid and calming. Everything is in sync with the new birth of the poem. Lovely, lovely, Toni.

    Reply

  6. annell4
    Aug 09, 2018 @ 08:39:22

    In the dark of the night, I hear you sing.

    Reply

  7. magicalmysticalteacher
    Aug 09, 2018 @ 10:46:41

    Ah, yes! Listening is the first step toward bringing a poem to birth.

    Reply

  8. coalblack
    Aug 09, 2018 @ 10:50:25

    I really love this, and love it when you write about nature because you have such a sure hand at it. The image of the old woman and the curtains was inspired. Brava, wonderful.

    Reply

  9. lillian
    Aug 09, 2018 @ 15:34:00

    What a wonderful comparison here
    “Their rasping and sawing pulls apart
    the silence like an old woman
    pulling apart the curtains of her bedroom window.”
    I always love your poetry, Toni….and love that you share your Japanese heritage with us.

    Reply

  10. Björn Rudberg (brudberg)
    Aug 09, 2018 @ 15:35:04

    Love the line about the old woman… the level of detail in the description adds so much I can hear the cicada (though we don’t have them)… I sit outside under a sky that’s not yet dark enough for stars… but sometimes at dusk we have bats in the sky.

    Reply

  11. Frank Hubeny
    Aug 09, 2018 @ 15:36:48

    I like that description of the Milky Way: “flows by silently”. I guess that is what “milk” would do as well, but the flowing seemed more evident in your description.

    Reply

  12. Glenn Buttkus
    Aug 09, 2018 @ 15:45:08

    Your final line is killer. So many of your poems unfold at, or near your home, I feel that I have strolled with you often, joined you sitting on the back stairs, climbed into a tree with you, & watched you working out with your kendo sword.

    Reply

  13. Jane Dougherty
    Aug 09, 2018 @ 16:33:08

    Lovely contrast between the rasping of the cicadas and the silent grace of the stars.

    Reply

  14. sanaarizvi
    Aug 09, 2018 @ 16:38:29

    Love this 💜 Such stunning imagery depicting how silence is being pulled apart.

    Reply

  15. whippetwisdom
    Aug 09, 2018 @ 16:49:06

    A beautiful write Toni, I love how the Milky Way flows by silently :o) xxx

    Reply

  16. Jo
    Aug 09, 2018 @ 17:14:48

    Love the image of the old woman pulling apart the curtain — vivid image in a lovely poem!

    Reply

  17. mhmp77
    Aug 09, 2018 @ 21:07:08

    kaykuala

    *Amanogawa flows by silently.
    In my head
    the poem begins to form.

    It has beginnings in so many different ways. That is true Toni!

    Hank

    Reply

  18. V.J. Knutson
    Aug 09, 2018 @ 22:01:05

    Nice rhythm to this…can feel the lulling leading to inspiration.

    Reply

  19. Ali Grimshaw
    Aug 09, 2018 @ 22:53:06

    I really liked this section of your poem,
    “Their rasping and sawing pulls apart
    the silence like an old woman
    pulling apart the curtains”
    I can hear and feel the connection.

    Reply

  20. memadtwo
    Aug 10, 2018 @ 13:13:15

    Sounds into words…that’s just right. (K)

    Reply

  21. Victoria C. Slotto
    Aug 10, 2018 @ 15:50:04

    I love the sensory images of pulling apart–really quite like releasing words stuck within.

    Reply

  22. purplepeninportland
    Aug 10, 2018 @ 20:10:58

    “Their rasping and sawing pulls apart
    the silence like an old woman
    pulling apart the curtains of her bedroom window.”

    Vivid image here, Toni. Soft, shining poem.

    Reply

  23. Frank J. Tassone
    Aug 11, 2018 @ 12:40:57

    Beautiful imagery, Toni! I love how you found inspiration to write from witnessing it all!

    Reply

  24. Anonymous
    Aug 22, 2018 @ 12:55:17

    HI Davide, Loy Krathong takes place on the evening of the full moon of the 12th month in the traditional Thai lunar calendar. So, the exact date of the festival changes every year. In 2018, it will be on the 23rd of November 2018. Best regards, Jess

    Reply

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