My once dainty hands became ugly.
Blisters from handling hell hot saute pans,
Cuts from too swift knife work,
My little finger permanently out of joint,
Mishapen, arthritic and painful on cold days.
Ugly brown scars from blisters burst
And reformed,
A long scar from a knife…
All the ugliness from a career of cooking.
When we married my husband slid the ring
Over the stump of my ring finger
and tenderly kissed it.
Years later he kissed the scar
On my stomach –
The scar where the laser knife slit me from navel to pubis,
The doctor removing from me
the organs and lymph nodes
Holding the cancer in his hands
and discarding as meducal waste.
My husband said:
Wear the two piece bathing suit at the beach – show the world you are a survivor,
So i did.
Because I am.
I showed off my scar proudly
And held my face up to the sun
And laughed.

19 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. rothpoetry
    Oct 28, 2018 @ 15:02:50

    A wonderful poem of embracing all that life brings!


  2. Shawna
    Oct 28, 2018 @ 15:27:22

    I have head-to-toe goosebumps from reading this. Your husband kicks ass. And you are such a warrior.


  3. Pat: willow88switches
    Oct 28, 2018 @ 20:26:21

    the scars of a life well lived, yes, with certain choices of one’s own pleasures, passions and callings – and others – not. But in the end, at the moment when day’s light is fading and we are sinking right down to rest, to sleep – all we have is the body, as vessel – and spirit which soars —- and if you feel beautiful, it is because you *know* it to be true. And no one can ever change this absolute truth.

    You are not a victim. Nor survivor. But a “warrior” – and this is a knightly way to walk through the world.

    Great poem that speaks with spunk and dignity. Cheers to recovery and acceptance of Beauty in all its gorgeous, spicy, flavourful and colourful ways of being.


    • kanzensakura
      Oct 28, 2018 @ 20:41:08

      I understand now. ??? yes you may call me Virginia. I promise not to throw a cleaver at you. I may even give you a tutorial in how to juggle knives.

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      • Pat: willow88switches
        Oct 28, 2018 @ 22:19:03

        oh hell, that would be so much of a laugh – NOT! my arthritic fingers and other assorted injuries means whacky balance sometimes, but I’d sure like to see it done …. LOL – maybe we could start with eggs?? πŸ˜‰


        • kanzensakura
          Oct 28, 2018 @ 23:17:56

          I cannot do eggs, balls, etc. Only knives and cleaver. 😊


          • Pat: willow88switches
            Oct 29, 2018 @ 13:45:28

            that’s totally wild! πŸ˜€


            • kanzensakura
              Oct 29, 2018 @ 14:12:30

              Years ago, on the cooking line, after the rush, we cooks in our various functions and stages would take turns doing tricks…juggling things, swallowing fire, throwing paper in the air and it coming down on knives to split the paper, having speed chopping contests…you get the picture.

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  4. Victoria C. Slotto
    Oct 28, 2018 @ 23:27:02

    Exactly how I feel about my numerous scars from dialysis, removal of one kidney and transplant. So grateful. Brava!


  5. anmol(alias HA)
    Oct 30, 2018 @ 23:27:25

    Ah, I love this β€” the scars are indeed a testimony of survival, of having lived a life through all its ups and downs. Show them and let the world see how beautiful they are! That laugh, in the end, is wild and wonderful. ❀


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