What Southern Women Know

For Marians Prompt on Real Toads for Day Seven of NAPOWRIMO  BTW. I am a southern woman and a debutante.

What Southern Women Know

They know if you used instant grits instead of stoneground grits
for your Sunday buffet.
They know where you are from by the way you say y’all.
They know where you were a deb and the year.

Also, they say in a sweet low voice, Bless your heart.
Only the true southern woman knows
whether it is meant in the nicest way or
if you are really saying…fuck you.

debutante ball from my hometown, Durham, NC

21 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Sherry Blue Sky
    Apr 07, 2019 @ 12:57:50

    Wow! Do debs still come out at cotillians? That era fascinates me. I used to love novels set in that era, when I used to read novels. Ball gowns, the scent of mimosa, gallantry, coquetry, and a lot of rules. LOL.


    • kanzensakura
      Apr 07, 2019 @ 13:30:07

      Yes we do. Kids go to Cotilkion school to learn etitqutte, how to dance, to bow and curtsy, how to properly use vast array if silver, how to pour tea, the whole can just. My cousin, a wealthy lady, was my sponsor. We are an old family but poor. The saying is all blue but no green, meaning, good blood but no money. I hated it but I did learn how to debone a baked fish with a knife and fork. My mother and grandmother were also debs.


  2. sanaarizvi
    Apr 07, 2019 @ 14:08:26

    Ha, it’s like reading between the lines when it comes to politeness and proper etiquettes 😊 lovely write! ❤


  3. ellecee
    Apr 07, 2019 @ 14:22:49

    Oh, how many times do we do the “right thing” with while grinding our teeth, ha ha


    • kanzensakura
      Apr 07, 2019 @ 14:31:22

      Lol. I never ground my teeth when I went to Cotillion school. I enjoyed it. I don’t grind my teeth either when responding to someone. I just smile and say, bless your heart. Let them figure it out especially when I am saying, fuck off.


  4. Ron.
    Apr 07, 2019 @ 14:45:59

    Y’ain’t kiddin. We (ie 2 Vermonters) recently visited friends in West Virginia. I have a pretty good ear & thought I’d try the accent. My host said, “Not bad. But that’s an eastern West Virginia accent.”


    • kanzensakura
      Apr 07, 2019 @ 15:37:04

      Haha! We folks down South always get amused when folks try to mimic us. We don’t try to imitate other accents cause we are happy with the way we speak. I have a Piedmont NC accent.

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  5. Marian
    Apr 07, 2019 @ 17:08:42

    Ah, bless your heart! 🙂


  6. isadoragruye
    Apr 07, 2019 @ 17:44:57

    Interesting observations. As a yankee, I am taking note 🙂


  7. Rosemary Nissen-Wade
    Apr 07, 2019 @ 18:09:28

    Ah yes. I was in awe of Southern manners when I had an extended visit to Texas. The women were graciousness itself … and oh, I felt like such an uncouth Aussie by comparison! Not that anyone was so rude as to make me feel that they agreed with that estimation – and I am now thankful to recall that no-one ever blessed my heart. 😀


  8. thotpurge
    Apr 07, 2019 @ 21:57:43

    LOL… there are women like that everywhere I think..especially the things they can tell from a meal you put together!


  9. Kerry
    Apr 08, 2019 @ 09:54:24

    Seems like a highly strained society to live in though.


    • kanzensakura
      Apr 08, 2019 @ 11:15:23

      No it isn’t. No more so than any other society. A very gracious and lovely place to live. Having lived other places, I always come back to my south that I love.

      Get Outlook for Android



  10. Margaret Elizabeth Bednar
    Apr 08, 2019 @ 12:24:55

    Ha! We are on the same track – but you speak from a point of view as an insider!


  11. Susie Clevenger
    Apr 08, 2019 @ 23:54:50

    Oh, yes, those southern girls know how to frame,” bless your heart.”


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