In Plain Sight

For the Meeting the Bar segment of Dverse Poets Pub. Bjorn gives the prompt today to write from a different perspective.

In Plain Sight
“When composing a verse let there not be a hair’s breath separating your mind from what you write; composition of a poem must be done in an instant, like a woodcutter felling a huge tree or a swordsman leaping at a dangerous enemy.” ― Bashō

well folks, here she is:
a woman who loves the ocean
and howls at the moon.
she observes the passing of the seasons
in the Japanese manner
and makes her own udon.
She has studied extensively Bartitsu
and is an expert at la canne.
She believes in brevity in poetry.
She hides in plain sight.

autumn moon –
the night is gone –
a crow awakens

toni and cat

32 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Glenn Buttkus
    Nov 07, 2019 @ 17:57:06

    Wow, /a crow awakens/–I wrote about being /a red cardinal in a murder of crows/. And you presented your self (wonderfully), as I attempted to do for/with my self. What a lovely day when our minds toil in tandem.


  2. Vivian Zems
    Nov 07, 2019 @ 18:19:36

    I think I know this woman. Is she the one who kicks snakes on her path? The one who writes excellent poetry? And the one who is a master with the sword?


  3. msjadeli
    Nov 07, 2019 @ 18:32:39

    A portrait of an enigmatic character if there ever was one. You’d made a wonderful protagonist in a series of novels, which would then be made into films. Who would you choose to play you in movies? And who would be your sidekick?


  4. Glenn A. Buttkus
    Nov 07, 2019 @ 20:11:17

    Hey, I laughed myself into a charly-horse! Imagination R us.


  5. memadtwo
    Nov 07, 2019 @ 20:54:57

    Hiding in plain sight…an apt summary. And any poem that mentions crows is a good one. (K)


  6. rothpoetry
    Nov 07, 2019 @ 22:00:01

    A great description. Love the cute photo!


  7. sarahsouthwest
    Nov 08, 2019 @ 01:33:06

    Interesting – using 3rd person cools it a little, makes it more analytical.


    • kanzensakura
      Nov 08, 2019 @ 05:53:01

      This act is more analytical. When the curtain comes up next time, the actress will be playing with more passion. And the key line, “brevity in poetry”.

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  8. kim881
    Nov 08, 2019 @ 03:07:44

    I love the opening line, Toni, a theatrical introduction, and the third person approach makes your poem biographical rather than autobiographical – you’ve taken a step back, while standing on the stage. Hiding in plain sight, haiku, crows…It’s all the things I like about you! The one thing I missed was you playing violin up a tree.


  9. Linda Lee Lyberg
    Nov 08, 2019 @ 10:05:43

    I so enjoyed this Toni!


  10. Fireblossom
    Nov 08, 2019 @ 13:10:06

    All these titles and yet there is more….


  11. lynn__
    Nov 08, 2019 @ 17:34:41

    Wonderfully unique, Toni! I enjoyed reading about “this woman” and seeing her girlhood photo…and agree with the brevity in poetry!


  12. Björn Rudberg (brudberg)
    Nov 09, 2019 @ 10:08:49

    I actually finds writing it in third person, thus distancing yourself makes it easier to see you as a part of what you belong to in the concluding haiku.


  13. erbiage
    Nov 09, 2019 @ 22:10:11

    I was rolling along with this lightly until ‘hiding in plain sight’ which is what I do all the time. Thanks for the mirror


  14. purplepeninportland
    Nov 13, 2019 @ 19:59:03

    “She believes in brevity in poetry/She hides in plain sight”

    This is so well written, and I love the perspective!


  15. Frank J. Tassone
    Nov 15, 2019 @ 18:37:01

    Simple elegance! Bravo!


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